The Big Vox Scoop

A Shadowplay Informant brings me an exciting scoop for the Vox Project, my plan to uncover the anonymous vocal artists lurking out of frame revoicing the people in close-up. As far as I know, this one has never been published and is unknown to the world, although as I’ll explain further down, a few insiders may have been playing with the info, teasing us.

EYES WIDE SHUT.

The masked girl is voiced by Cate Blanchett. There, it’s out.

If this is true (and I pursue deniability like a true weasel) then it’s not CB’s only masked and anonymous role. In HOT FUZZ she plays Simon Pegg’s girlfriend in the opening scenes, but in that movie her identity was leaked early on and was mentioned in numerous reviews. And in that movie it’s her behind the mask. In EWS it’s Julienne Davis who provides the physical elements of the performance.

It does seem like a startling coincidence for Blanchett to be asked to contribute a masked, uncredited performance to HF without somebody involved knowing the secret of her involvement in the Kubrick production (released in 1999, the same year as AN IDEAL HUSBAND, so CB had certainly been in the UK around the right time), so maybe this occult performance is known to a few people in the industry. They just never thought to tell me, until now.

Assuming this is indeed La Blanchett (and I have considerable confidence in my informant and I know how they got the information), I admire the subtly proletarian “Noo Yawk” accent she’s doing, appropriate for a character who is presumably a working girl. My informant says, “Could she have been imitating Kubrick’s accent? I don’t know, but CB can do just about anything, can’t she? With the possible exception of looking like Kate Hepburn.”

Of course I have to protect my source from the Vox Mafia, who guard their secrets jealously. If they catch you spilling the beans they cut out your vocal cords and replace them with one of those little cylinders that goes “moo” when you turn it upside down. So then you can only go “moo” in answer to any question, and even to say that much you have to do a handstand.