
It doesn’t really look like there’s a head growing up out of his neck, more like there’s a scrotum hanging out of his hat. Adorable.
For all his famous work with Walter Matthau (pictured), director Billy Wilder, who can be credited with first pairing Matthau with Jack Lemmon, never seemed to grasp the fundamental truth: we love Walter Matthau. Wilder kept casting W.M. as lowlifes, scumbags and grifters (from a crook in THE FORTUNE COOKIE to a hitman in the appalling BUDDY, BUDDY): hate-figures for Lemmon to act nervous and vulnerable next to, when in fact the entire point of this unique and wonderful actor is his transformation of boredom into an attractive quality, his hangdog avuncular grouchiness, and his long-suffering Oliver Hardy-type appeal to our sympathies.

These winning qualities all emanate from from a preposterous physical substance (avoid any film which reveals Matthau in a bath-towel), hunchbacked, pot-bellied, sunken-chested, bow-legged, flat-footed, with long bony hands flapping limply like the wing-tips of a disappointed eagle, and fronted by a rumpled and pouchy kisser that looks like it’s sculpted from all the wrinkly bits snipped off of fifty years of Hollywood royalty at the plastic surgeon’s.
Though celebrated for his comedies, Matthau’s best roles are in thrillers — CHARLEY VARRICK, THE TAKING OF PELHAM 123 and THE LAUGHING POLICEMAN, where his hard-assed side can find fuller expression without turning him into a heavy. Because we want a full demonstration of Matthau’s worst traits, and we want to love him the while.
THE LAUGHING POLICEMAN is one of the best films directed by Stuart Rosenberg, who died last March. Rosenberg also helmed COOL HAND LUKE which, in the sunny days of my childhood, seemed to be on T.V. every week. His Matthau film is a funny and smart and very veryseventies cop thriller, based on a Swedish novel but set in San Francisco. It walks a fine, meandering line between liberal tolerance and outright homophobia in its politics, and allows Matthau to grumble, of a high-powered lawyer: ‘Probably got enough juice to get a sodomy beef reduced to “following too close”,’ which is a great line even if it does commit the cardinal sin of using the words “sodomy” “beef” and “juice” in the same sentence. Anyhow, the whole thing fizzles out in an overlong bus chase, but we can forgive that for the beauteous fluorescent striplighting photography, the suave support of Bruce Dern and Louis Gossett Jnr, and Anthony Zerbe, who can do no wrong, and the fact that Joanna Cassidy’s beauty takes the breath away.

CHARLEY VARRICK is an authentically tough movie from the revered Don Siegel, and it’s maybe the guy’s best thriller. Walt is Charley, an independent heist artist who has trouble from corrupt authorities and a double-crossing young punk sidekick (the majestic Andy Robertson, best known as Scorpio the Zodiac Killer substitute in Siegel’s DIRTY HARRY).

THE TAKING OF PELHAM 123 can loosely be typed as a group-jeopardy movie, which is to say we can’t quite label it as a disaster movie (although Matthau did contribute a mysterious one-shot cameo to EARTHQUAKE, using the pseudonym Walter Matuschanskayasky. Very weird film, that, being one of the very few contemporary dramas where nearly all the cast were wigs). Joseph Sargent, who’s had an amazingly long career, directs this one, and seems at times to be channelling Fritz Lang, as he cross-cuts narrative strands to make definite statements: a line about the value of a human lifeis followed by a pointed cut to wads of ransom money being counted. Matthau is an island of bored humanity in a dyspeptic sea of surly New Yorkers, in a city on the verge of breaking down utterly because those who, like Matthau, care enough to do a decent job are in a distinct minority (and the film proceeds to thin their ranks even more).
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There’s a story I love from the making of BUDDY BUDDY, the only funny thing associated with that movie (which is to Wilder, Lemmon and Matthau as ATOLL K is to Laurel & Hardy — a painful object to be SHUNNED. For once the invective unleashed by Klaus Kinski in his hysterical autobiography is justified when he describes that film) –
Sliding down a laundry shoot, Matthau missed the crash mat and injured his back (stick with me, it gets funnier).
An ambulance is called and Jack Lemmon, an emotional man, kneels by his friend, in tears. “Can I get you anything?” he pleads, and, “Are you comfortable?”
Matthau looks up at him with his Droopy visage and replies, “I make a reasonable living.”

(Oh, and I’m working my way through Donald Westlake’s excellent Dortmunder books, and Matthau is my Blue Sky Casting choice for Dortmunder, hands down. Thriller fans, check them out!)