If John Ford Made Monster Movies
THE MAN WHO SHOT LIBERTY VALANCE (AND COULD CHEAT DEATH)
DONOVAN’S REEF BRAIN
THE UNQUIET MAN
MOGAMBO, FUNGUS OF TERROR
THE UNHOLY THREE GODFATHERS
MY DARLING FRANKENSTEIN
THEY WERE INVISIBLE
HOW GREEN WAS MY GWANGI
THE CABINET OF DR. HARRY CAREY
October 28, 2008 at 12:37 pm
HOW GREEN WAS MY URINE: EXPERIMENTS IN TERROR.
FOUR MALFORMED MEN AND A PRAYER VS. THE PHANTOM RIDERS.
HELL BENT WILD WOMEN: THE CRAVING.
THE INCREDIBLY STRANGE MR. LINCOLN WHO STOPPED LIVING AND BECAME A MIXED-UP SOUL HERDING IRON HORSE.
October 28, 2008 at 1:38 pm
CHAINSAW AUTUMN
MOGAMBO VS MOTHRA
THE GRAPES OF RATS
October 28, 2008 at 1:44 pm
SEVEN WOMEN AND THE MONSTER FROM HELL
YOUNG CASSIDY MEETS OLD DRACULA
TWO WHITE ZOMBIES RODE TOGETHER
October 28, 2008 at 2:53 pm
What Price Gory
She-Beast Wore a Yellow Ribbon
Wee Willie Wendigo
The Bloody Judge Priest
The Prisoner of Skull Island
Scary Mary of Scotland
October 28, 2008 at 2:55 pm
Chainsaw Autumn, damn that’s good!
October 28, 2008 at 3:27 pm
About John Ford by disembodied handerson
October 28, 2008 at 4:00 pm
anthropophagecoach
October 28, 2008 at 5:23 pm
The Lurchers
Ragecoach
The Man Who Ate Liberty Valance
Gaggin’ Master (or Maggot Master)
Seven Women Left… One Came Back
October 28, 2008 at 5:30 pm
The Long Voyage Doomed.
3 Bad Zombies.
Steamboat ‘Round The Ribcage
October 28, 2008 at 6:17 pm
The Whole Town’s Screaming
Chesty: Tribute to a Face-Hugger
October 28, 2008 at 6:41 pm
We must do this more often!
Stageghost
Screamboat Round the Bend
Severed Women
The Corpse Soldiers
The Ghost Patrol
and maybe my favourite
The Grasp of Wraiths
next week:
If Yasuhiro Ozu made pornos.
October 28, 2008 at 8:19 pm
First read this on my lunch break. For the rest of the day I’ve been racking my brain trying to think of titles, Couldn’t concentrate on anything else, couldn’t focus-Nothing. Half a whole day wasted trying to find a horrific pun on Cheyenne Autumn! 5 minutes ago I leapt out of the bath shouting “What Price Gory!” -And it’s gone, it’s all gone
I’ll never get those hours back, never
“Early Cummer”
“Why did the Lady get wet?”
“Floating Breeds”
“I did Porn, But…”
Screw you all!
October 28, 2008 at 8:40 pm
Oh, can’t believe we missed the obvious…
The DEFORMER!
As for Ozu the Porn-King(there’s a special place in hell for us)…I’ll go after the obvious.
A Cock in the Wind.
October 28, 2008 at 8:45 pm
On a totally unrelated note .Gerald “Deep Throat” Daminao is dead (I hasten to add he didn’t actually have any such…ability). Director of the most profitable movie of all time (apparently). His 1989 “Splendour in the Ass” made Kazan Weep
Now will those vampires release his groundbreaking “Let my Puppets Come” to DVD???
October 28, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Of course, I gather Damiano didn’t see any of those profits, which were snaffled up by the ever-hungry mob.
Congrats on The Deformer, Arthur, which not only fits the bill perfectly but should actually be used as a real title by somebody.
Let’s see, Ozu…
The Rectum of a Tenement Gentleman?
October 28, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Well, there’s always the rumor, inspired by the presence of Olive Carey in “Billy The Kid vs. Dracula,” that Patrick Wayne used the The John Ford Repertory Company to produce slash ‘n’ spurt thrillers in the ’70s.
A few sample titles:
Bludgeon’s Day
Dr. Bull, Medical Deviate
Flaggin’ Master (”His Kerchief Signalled Death!”)
Gore Sons
I Dismembered Mother Machree
*
Btw, I *love* David’s “Chesty” and “Two White Zombies Rode Together” titles.
October 28, 2008 at 11:57 pm
wank cheerfully
pissing fancy
an in-out in tokyo
the spunkata sisters
an autumn shafternoon
October 29, 2008 at 12:04 am
Yes, I think David’s Chesty reimagining sounds more interesting than the original.
“Shafternoon” makes me laugh also.
Early Bottom
Late Bottom
Wet Are the Dreams of Youth
October 29, 2008 at 1:16 am
The Flavor of Green Cum Over Rice
October 29, 2008 at 1:35 am
Eeewww!
I Graduated, Butt…
October 29, 2008 at 7:38 am
Ozu porn?
Until The Day We Meat Again
Fuck Touched My Legs
The Life of an Office Wanker
October 29, 2008 at 10:23 am
The last-named conjures up uncomfortable visions of Ricky Gervaise. Doing porn. In Japan?